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From On Purpose with Jay Shetty

Chris Appleton EXCLUSIVE: “I Thought My Kids Would Be Better Off Without Me” Opening up About The Darkest Night of His Life and What FINALLY Gave Him The Courage to Live Authentically

1:25:51
August 6, 2025
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
https://www.omnycontent.com/d/playlist/e73c998e-6e60-432f-8610-ae210140c5b1/32f1779e-bc01-4d36-89e6-afcb01070c82/e0c8382f-48d4-42bb-89d5-afcb01075cb4/podcast.rss

From Small-Town Windows To Hollywood Wigs: A Story About Identity And Reinvention

Chris Appleton’s conversation with Jay Shetty unfolds like an intimate masterclass in unlearning, resilience, and creative reinvention. Best known for sculpting iconic celebrity looks, Appleton traces a quieter, darker backstory: an English childhood marked by feeling out of place, years of hiding his sexuality, and a crisis that nearly ended his life. What follows is not merely a celebrity confession, but a practical road map about how therapy, honest conversations, and relentless craft can remake a life.

How A Childhood Memory Shaped Self-Abandonment And Later Freedom

Appleton describes a distinct childhood memory: a young boy looking out a rainy window and sensing he didn’t belong. That feeling of being “in the middle” between boys and girls steered him into adopting behaviors to fit in. He learned to hide the parts of himself that were tender or different. This theme — that aesthetic choices and even hairstyles can trace back to unexamined conditioning — recurs across the interview and in his book, Your Roots Don't Define You.

Craft, Consistency, And The Unexpected Career Break

Long before social media fame and sold-out shows, Appleton’s work ethic was forged by necessity and obsession: a job at 13, endless practice, and a refusal to stay boxed in as "just a salon hairdresser." He shares a turning point in Los Angeles: a wig improvisation for a high-stakes live TV performance that became a career catalyst. The lesson is clear — mastery multiplies when paired with willingness to experiment and sustain effort across small wins.

Mental Health, Shame, And The Moment Everything Changed

The interview does not shy away from the most painful chapters. Appleton recounts the moment he told his family he was gay, the fallout, and the night he planned to take his life. The raw narrative of that hospital wake-up became a pivot: a decision to surrender self-hatred and begin rebuilding. He credits therapy, daily honesty, and reconnecting with his inner child as central tools for recovery and sustained change.

Parenting, Public Life, And Protecting Peace

As a father, Appleton navigated a unique tension: shielding his children from bullying while wanting to live openly. He shares how reading letters from his kids — full of pride and love — reframed his purpose. At the same time, Appleton speaks candidly about the stress of tabloid scrutiny and the discipline required to protect emotional boundaries while living publicly.

Unpacking Identity Through Aesthetic Change And New Rituals

One of the episode’s most striking ideas is the link between outer transformation and inner truth: changing a hairstyle can catalyze deeper shifts in self-perception. Appleton’s approach to reinvention combines visual experiments with inner work — therapy, reflection, and steady realignment — so that aesthetic choices become expressions of an examined life rather than an escape.

  • Practical transformation: practice your craft relentlessly, learn outside your box, and respond to failure by analyzing and iterating.
  • Emotional first aid: create spaces for therapy, name shame, and untangle the parts of yourself formed to please others.
  • Parenting with honesty: protect children while modeling vulnerability and showing that identity can be shared with care.

Appleton’s story is at once a cautionary tale and a hopeful template: hiding an essential self can ripple into every relationship, career choice, and image you carry into the world. Through steady, sometimes brutal work — from therapy to confronting tabloid noise to reinventing a look on live television — he rebuilt an honest life aligned with who he is now. The conversation closes with a reminder that looking in the mirror and asking whether the life you lead reflects your true self is a law worth living by, because change and comeback are possible at any age.

Insights

  • If you feel out of place, trace aesthetic and behavioral habits back to childhood conditioning to understand their origin.
  • Treat therapy as practical daily work: show up consistently to unpack shame and reframe identity.
  • When fear of others’ reactions prevents honesty, start with small, safe conversations to build courage.
  • Use craft mastery as a scaffold for confidence; consistent small improvements compound into major breakthroughs.
  • Model vulnerability for children by sharing age-appropriate truth and demonstrating resilience through recovery.

Timecodes

00:00 Introduction to Chris Appleton and book overview
00:00 Childhood memory and early feelings of not belonging
00:00 Discovering hair as craft and early bullying
00:00 Coming out, telling family, and the suicide attempt turning point
00:00 Move to Los Angeles and the J.Lo wig breakthrough
00:01 Reading letters from his children and reflections on parenting

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